Tuesday, February 24, 2009


I don't know whats wrong with me lately but I'm a miserable crybaby mess tonight.

I started a book a few weeks ago.. 3 maybe. I finished it tonight. It was awesome. The book it self wasn't superbly written or anything and I did notice the author had a tendency to repeat herself but it was a beautiful story. It is called Magic Hour and it is written by Kristin Hannah. I was nearly at the end of the book on the bus trip to work today so I ambitiously decided to read that last 2 chapters before I did anything else tonight. I cried. And I cried. And I put the book down and composed my self, took a breather and picked up the book again. And again, I cried. I NEVER cry at books, or movies or sad shows! Maybe this is because I normally watch horror movies and read Stephen King but, UHG! I was BAWLING! I went through 3 napkins (I need to get a box of tissues at my desk apparently). I couldn't believe it. I don't know if this is because having children changes things or what but I was a blubbering idiot. Even lately I have been finding things in the news that I normally wouldn't get too bent out of shape about are really hitting home. For example, before I had the Bean, a story about a young kid killed in a car accident would certainly make me sad and think "Aww that's awful." but now it brings me to tears. I guess before you are a mother, you really don't understand that bond parents have to their children. So, while a child in pain or dying was certainly awful, it never really struck me as a reality. Now it shakes me. So if you like beautiful, moving stories about parents, children, love and all that mushy stuff, check out Magic Hour. If you live close enough I can lend you my copy.

Also, I started a scarf for David and I think I took the bloody thing apart and restarted it about 14 times, no kidding. I was just never happy with the way it was turning out. So Again I ripped the whole thing off my needles and started a scarf for Asha, my GF''s baby girl! It's a pretty cream color with a shimmery pink accent. I really like it so far, hopefully I can actually complete it. I really like knitting but so far all I can do it Knit and Purl, cast on and cast off and make tassels. LOL And for all the time I have spent knitting I have only completed one project :P

Additionally, I think I'm over tired and over stressed in general and I don't have enough creative outlets for easing those stressors. So I find my self overly pissy with D and the things that are or aren't being done around the house. I'm also completely under stimulated physically and am in dire need of affection, ie, a back rub, a good long snuggle, and various other sweet sensual physical touches that make a
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woman feel warm and loved.

Lastly, I think I'm having sugar withdrawls as I have finally started a healthy eating plan and have lost 3 lbs in the last 3 days. I'm drinking tons of water and I have cut all crap food out of my diet, which is hard to do at the office because there are snacks EVERYWHERE! I have been eating lots of small meals. Snacking on veggies and fruit and healthy low fat proteins like shrimp, turkey and cottage cheese. So there is a serious lack of sugar in my system. And, like Sass said, if I can't have sugar I better be getting sex.

Oh Woe as me!

It's 11:21 almost time for bed! Only 1 hour till I'm home.

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